Thoughts of Spring Blog Party over at Lynnette Krafts March 1-8, 2011!!!

Woo Hoo!!  It's a blog party!!  Lynnett Kraft is hosting a blog party from March 1st to March 8th!!  Lots of great prizes and good fun to be had--most importantly, meeting new bloggers and making new friends!!  Woo Hoo!!  Hope to see ya'll there!!

And the winner is...

Alaina!!! 

Please contact me Alaina!!  I need your address to get these pads to their new home!!  :-)
Send me an e-mail at weareqf@yahoo.com 


(The announcement is a bit belated--got a bunch of sick kiddos at home!!  Sorry!!)

Nursing Pad Giveaway...

Calling all breastfeeding moms!!! I have 6 pairs of 100% cotton flannel nursing pads to give away. The 4" pads have 4 layers of thirsty flannel and are double stitched. There's no waterproof barriers for trapping in heat and bacteria. Just super soft flannel.  Each pair pictured here is exactly what you will get.

This is a really easy giveaway. Just leave me a comment telling me that you enjoy breastfeeding your little one, a cute breastfeeding story, or whatever breastfeeding topic you want to share. No one has to post anything on their site or tell a friend (though you can if you want!).  At 7pm (Central Time) Sunday evening October 3rd I'll draw the winning name, post it here on my blog to notify the winner who will send me her address so that I can get these adorable pads to their new home.  See?  Easy!  :-)

Retail value:  $15

Busy!

Wow!! I can't believe how much of "not a whole lot" has been keeping me busy!! Does anyone else ever feel like that??? I mean my goodness!!

We're working really hard to get our showroom open soon. This has been a work in progress (very slow progress) for over a year now. What with all of Dh's back problems and setbacks things have taken way longer than we had hoped. But it'll all be ready in the Lord's perfect timing. Right? (Our family business has been installing fireplaces, marble surrounds, mantels, closet shelving/organizers, mirrors, shower doors, and bath accessories here at the Lake of the Ozarks since 1993. This is our first showroom so we're pretty excited.)

Personally we've been having some financial problems. Yeah, I know. With this economy, who hasn't?? I'd really appreciate some prayers for financial wisdom for our family. We have some pretty serious decisions to make and want to make the right ones.

Trying to fit in schoolwork as often as possible. We're running about 3 days a week right now and sometimes the girls are having to direct their own studies (with help from Daughter #1 when needed)--and they also help the little boys as needed. I'm looking forward to my physical presence not being in such high demand with the business so that I can focus on some good, fun learning again. :-)

Of course there's dr. visits, weekly counseling sessions for Daughter #1 (who's bipolar and has GAD--generalized anxiety disorder), shopping, the library, errands, and the list goes on and on. At the end of the week I wonder what happened--where the time went. My seasons just keep getting busier and busier. Thankfully I'm sure things will slow down again--and hopefully it's soon!!

Buy My Books... :-)

I just wanted to let ya'll know that I've listed some of my books on eBay. A lot of them are childbirth/unassisted birth related and pretty cool. Most of them are quite "used" and I debated whether to list them or not but figured that I'd go ahead and if someone didn't mind the warts they could get some great books!! I really hate to sell them but I need the room and with menopause beating me over the head... Sigh. And there's some misc. health related books and some school workbooks too. I'll be listing lots more in the next few weeks as well.

So here's a link to one of the books and you can just click "view other items" on the right hand side of the page...

Childbirth Without Fear by Grantly Dick-Read

Take a look!! Tell your friends!! Help me find new homes for these gems!! :-)

Drawing by Daughter #2

This is a drawing that Daughter #2 made a couple of weeks ago. She doodled it up on the back of her drawing book. There's a bit of glare on it--but isn't it just awesome!?!? She wants to learn computer animation and would be great at it. If we had a spare $75,000 we'd send her to Full Sail!! But alas, the Lord will have to greatly intervene if He wants her to pursue computer animation skills.

Just thought I'd share. :-)

My View Today

Driving to town today and noticed that I had my camera. The sky was amazing!!

A playful pup or a maybe a regal lion???

Beautiful winter scenery.

P.S. Just thought that I would mention that my *Son* was driving--not me!! Taking pictures while driving might be more dumb than texting while driving!! :-) Just FYI.

Redecorating Again...

DH says that he cannot figure out why I've stuck it out for the long haul with him when I'm always moving things around and shaking things up. Must be the bipolar (his!). Never a dull moment!! Ha Ha!! Anyways, I couldn't find anything Valentine-ish that was "me" so this will have to do!!

Cold...

Where is all that Global Warming when you need it??? It is COLD!!! And I wouldn't mind it so bad if I didn't worry about our animals. We have things battened down pretty well. There's 1+ inches of snow on the ground with more coming the middle of this week. But it's the cold that's really hard.

Visions of lush, green gardens are dancing in my head!!!

More Strange Weather

Ok, I can understand all of the snow storms that much of our nation is having but our temps here in Mid Missouri is in the low 50s and we are having thunderstorms. Thunderstorms 2 days before Christmas??? Sure we've had them in December before but that was always the first half of the month.

I've put my request in for 2 feet of snow this year!! Yes, really. I LOVE the snow!! Since we live around the Lake of the Ozarks area we don't really get much snow. Generally we have ice. Not as fun and quite destructive.

This is a picture of our Mimosa tree in the front yard a couple of years ago. See the seed pods sitting there frozen horizontally from the blowing rain/ice and wind? Do you see one of our many little feathered friends that we try to keep fed during the winter? The ice may not be friendly but it sure makes for a beautiful landscape.

A Few Thoughts on "Skillet"

Around our house the hot new music item is the new Skillet CD, Awake. Even Son #1, who usually likes a softer style of music, loves it. In fact it's not uncommon for little 5 year old Son #6 to walk through the house singing "I feel like a monster" in a gruff little voice!! Way too funny!!

Over the years I've had sort of a love/hate (not "hate" really--more like "frustrated") relationship with Skillet. Many of their songs are on my most favorite list of songs. On the other hand it's not difficult to see that the band/band member has some issues. I'm sad that many of their songs have a serious spirit of unforgiveness. Nevertheless, it makes for some really good discussions with my children, for which I am very thankful. Anger, unforgiveness and blaming are spiritual issues we deal with in our family very often and so it's helpful to have this object lesson via one of our passions, music, to turn to for child training in taming that particular beast. :-)

From this new CD Awake, there is one song in particular that speaks to me in this time of my life...

One Day Too Late

Skillet

Tick tock hear the clock countdown
Wish the minute hand could be rewound
So much to do and so much I need to say
Will tomorrow be too late

Feel the moment slip into the past
Like sand through an hourglass
In the madness I guess I just forget
To do all the things I said

Time passes by
Never thought I’d wind up
One step behind
Now I’ve made my mind up

Today I’m gonna try a little harder
Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget
’Cause we don’t have long, gonna make the most of it

Today I’m gonna love my enemies
Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place
’Cause tomorrow could be one day too late
One day too late
One day too late

Tick tock hear my life pass by
I can’t erase and I can’t rewind
Of all the things I regret the most I do…
Wish I’d spent more time with you

Here’s my chance for a new beginning
I saved the best for a better ending
And in the end I’ll make it up to you, you’ll see
You’ll get the very best of me

Time passes by
Never thought I’d wind up
One step behind
Now I’ve made my mind up

Today I’m gonna try a little harder
Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget
’Cause we don’t have long, gonna make the most of it

Today I’m gonna love my enemies
Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place
’Cause tomorrow could be one day too late

Your time is running out
You’re never gonna get it back
Make the most of every moment
Stop saving the best for last

Today I’m gonna try a little harder
Gonna make every minute last longer
Gonna learn to forgive and forget
’Cause we don’t have long, gonna make the most of it

Today I’m gonna love my enemies
Reach out to somebody who needs me
Make a change, make the world a better place
’Cause tomorrow could be one day too late

One day too late
One day too late
One day too late
One day too late

Not long ago Son #6 was on the scale to see how much he weighed. I told him that he was growing and is such a big boy now. He looked up at me and said, "Mommy I want to be a baby again. I wish we could rewind." I hugged him and told him that we can't do that. All we can do is "press play". It was sad and cute all in one. Poor little guy. I know just how he feels!!

Goodbye Grandma

Yesterday, my dad called. I hadn't heard from him in a while and was mentally guessing why he was calling. He sadly informed me that my grandma had passed away. She was 92 on her birthday earlier this month.

I hadn't seen my grandma in a little over 4 years. It was shortly before she went into the nursing home after she broke her hip. She had alzheimers and several months ago my step mom said that you couldn't really even recognize her as she was so tiny and wasted away. She didn't really know who anyone was anymore and slept a lot. My dad's side of the family has an uncanny gift for living in ill health for a very long time.

I don't believe that my grandma ever gave her heart to the Lord and was very outspoken against "religion". I loved her irregardless. I will miss her.

The funeral is on Monday morning so we will probably start our Monday bright and early driving the 4+ hour drive there and will have to leave that evening to get home for another busy week.

Please pray for our family and for traveling mercies.

Renaming My Blog

After much thought I've decided to rename my blog to Heritage Homestead Ramblings. While I love the name "Seeking the Ancient Paths" my folksy style of blogging does that title disservice. I considered starting a new blog but thought about how much work that would be. Call me lazy but I really like this blog and don't really want something different--just a new name. :-)

National Day of Prayer

I really love the song "Heal Our Land" by Michael Card written for the National Day of Prayer quite a few years ago. And how much more appropriate it is today as our great nation has strayed even further away from our Christian heritage than ever.

Heal Our Land

by Michael Card

Forgive oh Lord - and heal our land
And give us eyes to seek your face - and hearts to understand
That you alone - make all things new
And the blessing of the land we love - are really gifts from you
Refrain:
If my people - Will humbly pray
And seek my face and turn away - From all their wicked ways
Then I will hear them - And move my hand
And freely then will I forgive - and I will heal their land.
Unite our hearts - in one accord
And make us hungry for your peace - and burdened for the poor
And grant us hope - that we might see
The future for the land we love - our life, our liberty
Refrain:
If my people - Will humbly pray
And seek my face and turn away - From all their wicked ways
Then I will hear them - And move my hand
And freely then will I forgive - And I will heal their land
And I will heal their land
Heal their land

Letting Go

Three long years ago I was awaiting the birth of our 11th child (my 14th pregnancy). You know how that last month is. Huge. Miserable. A beached whale sort of feeling. Little did we know then that our baby boy would be stillborn.

In my heart I think I knew that we were going to lose him. A mother's intuition sort of thing, I suppose. We were doing well financially and I bought so much stuff for him. A new bassinett, clothes, cloth diapers, toys~~so much. Very unlike me. It's as if I wanted to jam as much buying in the short amount of time that I had.

I wonder how different our lives would be today if our baby had lived. Our little guy (Son #6) was/is SOOOOOO... demanding. I can't imagine how difficult it would have been to have had a new baby and to have to have dealt with him too. We would have found a way, I'm sure. I remember how much we were looking forward to having a new baby in spite of Son #6's command of our attention. A sweet challenge.

My body feels as though it might finally be healed of the trauma of birthing a 12 pound dry baby who could not offer any help. His shoulders were stuck and I had nurses in front of me pulling on him, nurses on the bed with me pushing down on my ribs and stomach to push him out, and nurses at my sides hollering for me to push. I couldn't walk without serious support the first week after the birth~~or even move comfortably for a month.

Slowly, I've healed physically. We had hoped that the Lord would grant us another pregnancy/baby to help our hearts heal as well (though our sweet baby can never be replaced) but I've not had one single positive pregnancy test in all this time.

Are we done having children? Am I selfish to want another baby? The Lord says that children are a blessing and I deeply desire to be blessed again. I love each one of our children so very much and have given so much of myself for them--a joyful sacrifice. Every day I look at our children and adorible grandbaby and thankfulness wells up in my heart to overflowing. How can I NOT want another baby???

Of course, this decision is not in my hands. There is only One Person who can create life. As much as we may wish for another pregnancy, only the Lord can open my womb. We have been waiting for years now to conceive, but it has not happened.

While I am still praying that we might yet have more children I have decided that it is time to let go a little. I've decided to put up for auction the new cloth diapers that I bought during that pregnancy on eBay. It's a hard decision but I feel the need to move past hanging on to all of the baby stuff in hopes that we might need it. You know? The diapers are so small and beautiful. Such a hard decision and yet a freeing one. I know that I will not get out of them as much as I paid for them. If they sell I plan to use the money to buy more fruit trees for our family. What a blessing it will be to the children and grandchildren to eat fruit from those trees in due time.


Aren't they so cute???

Please Stand By...

I love computers. When they work right, that is!!! And right now, mine isn't. Don't know what the problem is but I'm hoping to have it running right by tomorrow. See you when all is right in my little world again!!

A New Year

Wow!! How did it get to be 2009 already?? Weren't we just preparing for Y2K a few months ago?? Don't laugh now, but yes, sometimes it really does feel that way. I'm afraid that I have a nasty habit of letting time get away from me. I'm a procrastinator--big time. Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow!!?? Sadly, much of it is this mindset that us "messy perfectionists" have which comes down to the idea that "I cannot do __________ unless this, that and the other is first accomplished". It shows up in nearly every area of my life and each role that I play: wife, mother, teacher, domestic engineer, office manager, artist and even (and most sadly) being a Christian. It's a curse and by far my worst shortcoming. I take time for granted and miss many opportunities while waiting for just the right circumstances to magically see to it that my tasks are done. I'm often big on dreams and short on accomplishment.

And why am I tattling on myself this way? Well, I've been thinking about "New Year's Resolutions". Last year I decided not to have any--and that didn't turn out so good. I mean life carried on and all but I just didn't have any new goals to reach for--and that is NOT good for me. I have a hard time reaching my hard-to-live-up-to ideals anyway--but at least I have a direction in which to travel. Without my goals it's like going on vacation without a destination in mind. I drive around seeing the sights, and even have a good time, but in the end most of that time wasn't spent very productively and a lot of my time ended up being wasted.

So this year I thought that I would evaluate my roles and at have at least one resolution to keep me reaching a little higher. So here they are...

1) Christian. This may seem vague but I need to spend more time in the word and in prayer. I don't want to set a goal of reading X amount everyday or spending X minutes in prayer because it doesn't take long, with our crazy household, for me to fall behind and then there's the feelings of guilt and futility that do more harm than good. I would also like to commit more time to memorizing scripture and working with the kids to memorize more too.

2) Wife. One of the dangers that I think of my parents generation, and of ours as well, is that we want our children to be "happy" and we go out of our way to give them the things they want and defer to their wishes. I know that I grew up thinking that the world really did revolve around me. As an adult and a wife it is hard to defer my wishes to those of my husband. Sometimes I get hurt that he just doesn't want to make me "happy" and do everything my way. So my resolution in this area is to stop thinking of myself/my ideas/my desires as more important than DH's and to submit to him more gracefully (I can make a pretty ugly scene sometimes!!).

3) Mother. Focus on NOT allowing my life to revolve around making my children "happy" so much. I know that they aren't going to be thrilled with this resolution!! :-) My eyes are being opened to seeing that this is a handicap rather than an asset. Life can be quite unpleasant sometimes and we need to find peace in living through less than "happy" circumstances. If this time of economic uncertainty continues in the direction that it is going, our family, with our small business, may have some really hard times ahead of us (and we ARE already struggling). The children will be much better off if we begin now to wean ourselves off of our "lavish" lifestyle (eating convenience foods and new electronics, etc...). If things do indeed get bad, we will have a head start on surviving and fights over "happiness" will be on more realistic topics rather than purely selfish ones.

4) Teacher. We have gotten behind in our studies. The children have definite gaps. I resolve that this year we will get caught up and do some of the projects I have wanted to do and haven't gotten around to. Also I have fallen away from reading to the children. Both during school time and before bed. I am getting back to that now and hope to continue for a good long time. It appears that the children have less of a zeal to read on their own when I do not read to them. Not good.

5) Domestic Engineer. Organize!!! Already I have made some progress in this area, going through closets and bookshelves. I'm listing stuff on EBay, throwing out, and giving away. DH hates how I tackle the closets first when I do a deep cleaning/organizing--but the success of having a clean and organized space in which to store things really boosts my spirits--and it helps me to work through to completion.

6) Office Manager. I'm really terrible with filing and keeping my workspace/office tidy. I fall behind in my paperwork often. Our Internet service is at our office we have in town so I tend to get sidetracked by playing online. It's freeing to not have Internet at home and I can focus on being home while I am there, but it's a real temptation to spend a lot of time surfing while I am supposed to be working. So in essence, my resolutions in this area are to be to be more diligent to finish up to completion my tasks, be more tidy, and not to spend so much time on the Internet.

7) Artist. Ok so I'm not really an artist--but I am artistic. ;-) My "messy perfectionism" really comes into play in this area and I tend to start/plan lots of awesome projects but have trouble finishing them because I feel this need to have a huge block of interrupted time to work. I know that most "moms of many" have loads of that, right?! Giggle. So anyway... I resolve to have my craft/sewing spaces and projects better organized so that I can take advantage of the smaller blocks of time to work so that I can accomplish more in less time. Sounds easy. :-)

I think that my resolutions this year have two major themes: Organization and Self Denial. I so want to get to the end of 2009 and look back and say, "Yes, things were crazy but look at what we accomplished". Yessiree!! That's a plan.

Happy Holidays

I had hoped to be able to sit down for a few minutes and post something really awesome (are you snickering?)--but it seems that time just keeps slipping away from me. And what with Christmas approaching in... Yikes!! 3 days!! I just have so much left to do yet. So it appears that it would be best if I relieve my mind of another job on my "to-do" list and wait until after the holidays to do any writing. Ah, I think I feel a little better already. ;-) The ten foot list is a quarter of an inch shorter now!! Giggle. Anyway...

Merry Christmas to all!!!

DH is finally home and resting from the long flight back. Much to our sadness, Son #2 stayed behind. He is still trying to sort out the Lord's will for his life. We will be praying for him to be able to clearly discern what the Lord would have him do. :-)

Just wanted to update everyone. Gotta get back to the family. Hope to write more later. Blessings to you all!!

And the Results Are...

Sorry it's taken so long to post and tell everyone how my fast went. I did make it to 7 full days. Much of that time I don't remember very well. The first 3 days were the worst with hunger and weakness. After that, the hunger was more manageable--but still very present. On the fourth day I decided that I just couldn't stay in bed anymore and spent my time thereafter doing light housework. And yes I did end up cooking most of our family's meals after that fourth day. By the fifth day my vision was so blurred that I had to use my strongest reading glasses just to see well enough to get around--and forget reading!! I broke my fast Thanksgiving morning with a couple of apples for breakfast, cooked carrots for lunch and then ate a light Thanksgiving meal for supper. I admit that it was a pretty harsh way to break the fast but I survived. :-)



I am not raw. You see, every year I have at least one raw food binge since I discovered the raw food diet about four years ago. Each time the Lord speaks to my heart that this is not the diet He desires for our family but that we are to eat the Weston A. Price diet--also known as a "traditional" or "slow foods" diet. He is so patient with me to keep redirecting my attention to this idea when I get all crazy with my raw food binges. And not that it's not good for me to eat lots of raw food. It's just that it's not what He wants as a permanent solution for our family.

I love the whole theory of the raw food diet. But in reality it just doesn't work well for me--a protein type--and for feeding our large family. I have many raw food books and so many of them talk about how we are designed to eat raw fruits, veggies, nuts and seeds only--but in using the Bible as our standard, I wonder that if this were truely the case why does the Word not direct us to eat this way. When we were given the dietary laws why not at least add in "Better yet to not eat meat at all and nothing cooked"? And why liken the Promised Land to a "land flowing with milk and honey"--two taboos on a strict raw vegan diet? Or as one of my favorite verses in the Bible says: "You will have plenty of goats' milk to feed you and your family and to nourish your servant girls." (Psalm 27:27)

Raw fooders blame cooked food on every disease in existance but I conclude that it is more an issue of laziness, greed and gluttony. I know in my case I tend to be lazy when it comes to preparing a wholesome meal and the food industry is eager to make money off of me by selling easy to prepare "meals" which have no nutrition to speak of and is loaded with all sorts of nasties. Then we just plain tend to eat too much anyway.

In many ways, our family eats a more traditional diet than most since we live on our little hobby farm and we garden. But it's still difficult to slow down and cook in a traditional way in our busy lifestyle.

What can I say? We're a work in progress. :-)